I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
