we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
