wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
