Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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