I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize