Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I need to sanitize my soul.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
