You're completely useless in the revolution.
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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