guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
