oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
