The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
