At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
either way he was missing a nipple.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I need to sanitize my soul.
The adults are the big ones right?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
