is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
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