Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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