dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
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