Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
