I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize