You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize