how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Randomize
