you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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