Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
