If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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