Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Randomize
