i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
