I hope mine doesn't look like that
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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