(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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