First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Randomize