I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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