That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
