plz talk dirty to me
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
