No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
