Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
