reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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