this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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