There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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