should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize