I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
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