We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
