Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Randomize
