I drank myself into bisexuality again.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
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