dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
