Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
