Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I don't think brook has ever known best
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
