your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
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