You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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