There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
