There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Randomize
