when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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