he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
