I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Randomize
