this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
